This is another backlog post! That means it's not fancy with pictures and stuff like my other posts, just here for reference. A lot of these products are discontinued.
These are the second part of a large bundle of Alkemia perfumes I purchased secondhand from another IMAMer. Enjoy!
Faerie Queen
"A sensual spell woven from wild strawberries, strawberry blossoms, freshly unearthed black truffles, crocus sativius, vanilla leaf ferns, green patchouli, tree moss, agarwood, oak bark, enchanter's nightshade, and a drop of honey mead."
Me: In bottle: Heavy heavy flowers and soap. Reminds me of a frilly little tea place me and my gals went once just for funnsies, but without the awesome aroma of tea floating around. On my skin: Floral mostly gone, it's this soapy fruityness with a side of something darker that I can't identify.
Bf: In bottle: It has like a weird... I dunno. It smells like caulking for sinks and stuff. On my skin: Did I already say that something smells like cheap bathroom soap? Because it smells like that.
RM: In bottle: Smells like pot-pourri. It's just pot-pourri. Straight up. Straight up. Plus like air freshener and aerosol. On her skin:
Caliph's Beloved
"To the traditional base of musk, ambergris, coriander, cardamom, and carnation, we have added elements reputed to be particularly enticing to lovers (new or existing) - almond blossom, Madagascar vanilla beans, galangal root, and a secret blend of aphrodisiac spices."
Me: In bottle: Powdery floral. Smells quite a bit like some magazine insert perfumes.
Bf: In bottle: I don't know what this smells like... Smells like cereal, kind of. A little bit. On my skin: This one like burns my eye! Just like, smelling it burns my eye. I think you should have a destash... of all of your perfumes. And then buy me something.
RM: In bottle: What? Where are you getting... no, it just smells like lighter pot-pourri. On her skin:
Falling Stars on Winter Solstice
"Aromatic balsam needles, a dab of dark musk, sweet myrrh, incense resins, melted snow, and a touch of cabin woodstove smoke."
Me: In bottle: Sandalwood or incense? I'm not very good at identifying these sorts of smells, but it does remind me of those sandalwood fans that I got from China when I was little. On my skin: Nah, it's incense. Warm and woody. It's nice; I just don't like incense all that much.
Bf: In bottle: Is this the one you just gave me? Smells exactly the same. I don't even know. This one gave me a headache. On my skin: This one smells like a freshly cleaned bathroom. Where someone has cleaned it, and then left the windows open. It smells like this bathroom I found that nobody goes to. It's an inviting bathroom smell, but you wouldn't want to smell like it.
RM: In bottle: Mmmph, awful. I don't even know. It's just not good. It smells like melted plastic!
Calaveras De Azucar (Sugar Skulls)
"Hauntingly sweet sugar skulls nestled against a backdrop of sugared white ambers."
Me: In bottle: Sugar and Macy's perfume area. Or any mall perfume area, really. On my skin: Pink. Very girly, very sugary. The mall perfume part has faded almost completely to nil, but now there's this slight pleasant white floral in the back. It's not too bad, but I'm just not a pink person.
Bf: In bottle: Smells like cotton candy. (RM: You think everything smells like cotton candy!) Nooo, this one smells like hella cotton candy! On my skin: Smells weird on you. Smells soapy on you.
RM: In bottle: Oh I like this one! Yeah no, it just smells like a Calvin Klein thing. I'm gonna put it on my skin now. I have nothing funny to say because I like it. On her skin: Hmmm... It tastes...or, it turns really warm and sugary on my wrist-- It's probably just my heat emanating out of it. I liked it in the bottle... Now it does smell like spun sugar. You know, usually I don't like Alkemia, but this one's okay. It has under it a weird herbal undertone. I'm really weirded out actually, this is weird. I'm not averse to this *inhales deeply* I need some fresh air. Now it smells like flowers. Now its stinging my eyes for no reason. I'm kind of obsessed with sniffing it though, so I guess I like it.
Patchouli Cacao
"A dark and decadent romance of ultra-rich bittersweet Maralumi cacao, aged Madagascar Bourbon vanilla, and a blonde Indonesian patchouli single note that encompasses musk, earth, ambergris, wood, and tabac..."
Me: In bottle: Hot cocoa and wood shavings. I thought I would hate this from the first go, but the chocolate smell is pretty convincing and the patchouli isn't too weird for me...yet. On my skin: From far away, it smells like a nosebleed. Like, darkly metallic. Up close, it's got quite the dark Chinese herb smell. Chocolate's barely there, just to add a bit of sweetness.
Bf: In bottle: MMMM. Smells like dark chocolate. Eat it... EAT ITTTT. On my skin: This one smells like close to how you normally smell like. (Me: What? No.)
RM: In bottle: The last time I smelled chocolate I didn't like it! It smelled like dark sofas! Eugh, it smells like throwup. Oh wait, it smells like pills. Okay, I sniffed too close. From far away, it can pass off as chocolate. Shitty chocoalate. Not Hershey's chocolate, but actual shit chocolate. Like total poop. 2% poop. I put it on my skin so I can smell like poop. On her skin: Oh *groans* I smell like poop. Augh, I smell like poop! What am I gonna do??? Now it just smells like ginseng. Like, what the fuck. Shitty ginseng.
Magus
"Rare black Ethiopian frankincense and High John the Conqueror root blended with the sensual musk of ambrette seed and the evocative mystery of labdanum and opoponax swirled with a smokey touch of vetivert root, Cambodian oud, and Somalian incense."
Me: In bottle: Oh it doesn't even smell bad. It smells like mosquito repellant. The nice smelling kind from China that reminds me of my childhood. (RM: Yeah, but you gotta go deeper. ...That's what she said.) On my skin: at some point it turned very poopy, then dried down to a smokey, masculine scent. It's aight, if you like smokey, masculine scents. Throw is FAR.
Bf: In bottle: If you put your nose really close, it burns. I dunno. I dunno what this smells like. It smells like... some sort of construction chemicals or something.
RM: In bottle: Construction chemicals? That makes me optimistic. EW. Oh! That's my first reaction to all things by this...stupid... I see where you're coming from. It smells like that mosquito repellant again (I'm trying to identify what kind of construction chemical this is) yeah, rubber. On her skin: Cement mixer. I'm gonna smell like ginseng, poop, and cement mixer. Now it's mosquito repellant again. Julie, you should wear a lot of this and you'll never get bitten by mosquitoes again.
Hellcat
"A dark and ferociously sexy blend of Black Oud, Black Musk, Labdanum, and spiced Pipe Tobacco blended with a seductive purr of Black Opium."
Me: In bottle: A combination of the mild Cetaphil smell, mosquito repellant, and magazine perfume insert. It's not even bad either! I... I kinda like it. On my skin: Turned sour and now it smells like pickles and Cetaphil. Don't get me wrong, I'm a pickles lovin' girl, but I've never possessed a need to smell like one.
Bf: In bottle: Have you ever thought that people were selling these because they don't like them??!? This smells disgusting. Take this awaayyy...
RM: In bottle: *laughing* I'm going to fucking cry. Mosquito repellant. And.... rotten soap? I dun wanna put it on my skin, bro.
Deadly Nightshade
"A darkly feminine blend of deep purple violets in a hypnotic chypre of sueded dark leathers, aged patchouli, midnight-black amber, and a narcotic swirl of opium."
Me: In bottle: Oddly fruity leather. On my skin: I hate agreeing that things smell like upholstery, but yup, this smells like a new leather sofa. Leather leather leather. Strong leather. Throw is far, and it's so strong that I literally cannot smell anything but it right now. After a while it takes on this sweetness that reminds me of my Retread Lush Conditioner, entwined with the leather. It's already lasted a good long while; wouldn't be surprised if I could still smell it tomorrow morning even after a shower.
Bf: In bottle: Smells like dish.. smells like the green dish soap. What brand is that? It smells like it.
RM: In bottle: It smells like... walking into somebodies house... and they have... leather upholstery. On her skin: Yeah, it smells like this squishy orange fruit that I can't name... and leather upholstery. Squishy orange fruit leather upholstery.
These are the second part of a large bundle of Alkemia perfumes I purchased secondhand from another IMAMer. Enjoy!
Faerie Queen
"A sensual spell woven from wild strawberries, strawberry blossoms, freshly unearthed black truffles, crocus sativius, vanilla leaf ferns, green patchouli, tree moss, agarwood, oak bark, enchanter's nightshade, and a drop of honey mead."
Me: In bottle: Heavy heavy flowers and soap. Reminds me of a frilly little tea place me and my gals went once just for funnsies, but without the awesome aroma of tea floating around. On my skin: Floral mostly gone, it's this soapy fruityness with a side of something darker that I can't identify.
Bf: In bottle: It has like a weird... I dunno. It smells like caulking for sinks and stuff. On my skin: Did I already say that something smells like cheap bathroom soap? Because it smells like that.
RM: In bottle: Smells like pot-pourri. It's just pot-pourri. Straight up. Straight up. Plus like air freshener and aerosol. On her skin:
Caliph's Beloved
"To the traditional base of musk, ambergris, coriander, cardamom, and carnation, we have added elements reputed to be particularly enticing to lovers (new or existing) - almond blossom, Madagascar vanilla beans, galangal root, and a secret blend of aphrodisiac spices."
Me: In bottle: Powdery floral. Smells quite a bit like some magazine insert perfumes.
Bf: In bottle: I don't know what this smells like... Smells like cereal, kind of. A little bit. On my skin: This one like burns my eye! Just like, smelling it burns my eye. I think you should have a destash... of all of your perfumes. And then buy me something.
RM: In bottle: What? Where are you getting... no, it just smells like lighter pot-pourri. On her skin:
Falling Stars on Winter Solstice
"Aromatic balsam needles, a dab of dark musk, sweet myrrh, incense resins, melted snow, and a touch of cabin woodstove smoke."
Me: In bottle: Sandalwood or incense? I'm not very good at identifying these sorts of smells, but it does remind me of those sandalwood fans that I got from China when I was little. On my skin: Nah, it's incense. Warm and woody. It's nice; I just don't like incense all that much.
Bf: In bottle: Is this the one you just gave me? Smells exactly the same. I don't even know. This one gave me a headache. On my skin: This one smells like a freshly cleaned bathroom. Where someone has cleaned it, and then left the windows open. It smells like this bathroom I found that nobody goes to. It's an inviting bathroom smell, but you wouldn't want to smell like it.
RM: In bottle: Mmmph, awful. I don't even know. It's just not good. It smells like melted plastic!
Calaveras De Azucar (Sugar Skulls)
"Hauntingly sweet sugar skulls nestled against a backdrop of sugared white ambers."
Me: In bottle: Sugar and Macy's perfume area. Or any mall perfume area, really. On my skin: Pink. Very girly, very sugary. The mall perfume part has faded almost completely to nil, but now there's this slight pleasant white floral in the back. It's not too bad, but I'm just not a pink person.
Bf: In bottle: Smells like cotton candy. (RM: You think everything smells like cotton candy!) Nooo, this one smells like hella cotton candy! On my skin: Smells weird on you. Smells soapy on you.
RM: In bottle: Oh I like this one! Yeah no, it just smells like a Calvin Klein thing. I'm gonna put it on my skin now. I have nothing funny to say because I like it. On her skin: Hmmm... It tastes...or, it turns really warm and sugary on my wrist-- It's probably just my heat emanating out of it. I liked it in the bottle... Now it does smell like spun sugar. You know, usually I don't like Alkemia, but this one's okay. It has under it a weird herbal undertone. I'm really weirded out actually, this is weird. I'm not averse to this *inhales deeply* I need some fresh air. Now it smells like flowers. Now its stinging my eyes for no reason. I'm kind of obsessed with sniffing it though, so I guess I like it.
Patchouli Cacao
"A dark and decadent romance of ultra-rich bittersweet Maralumi cacao, aged Madagascar Bourbon vanilla, and a blonde Indonesian patchouli single note that encompasses musk, earth, ambergris, wood, and tabac..."
Me: In bottle: Hot cocoa and wood shavings. I thought I would hate this from the first go, but the chocolate smell is pretty convincing and the patchouli isn't too weird for me...yet. On my skin: From far away, it smells like a nosebleed. Like, darkly metallic. Up close, it's got quite the dark Chinese herb smell. Chocolate's barely there, just to add a bit of sweetness.
Bf: In bottle: MMMM. Smells like dark chocolate. Eat it... EAT ITTTT. On my skin: This one smells like close to how you normally smell like. (Me: What? No.)
RM: In bottle: The last time I smelled chocolate I didn't like it! It smelled like dark sofas! Eugh, it smells like throwup. Oh wait, it smells like pills. Okay, I sniffed too close. From far away, it can pass off as chocolate. Shitty chocoalate. Not Hershey's chocolate, but actual shit chocolate. Like total poop. 2% poop. I put it on my skin so I can smell like poop. On her skin: Oh *groans* I smell like poop. Augh, I smell like poop! What am I gonna do??? Now it just smells like ginseng. Like, what the fuck. Shitty ginseng.
Magus
"Rare black Ethiopian frankincense and High John the Conqueror root blended with the sensual musk of ambrette seed and the evocative mystery of labdanum and opoponax swirled with a smokey touch of vetivert root, Cambodian oud, and Somalian incense."
Me: In bottle: Oh it doesn't even smell bad. It smells like mosquito repellant. The nice smelling kind from China that reminds me of my childhood. (RM: Yeah, but you gotta go deeper. ...That's what she said.) On my skin: at some point it turned very poopy, then dried down to a smokey, masculine scent. It's aight, if you like smokey, masculine scents. Throw is FAR.
Bf: In bottle: If you put your nose really close, it burns. I dunno. I dunno what this smells like. It smells like... some sort of construction chemicals or something.
RM: In bottle: Construction chemicals? That makes me optimistic. EW. Oh! That's my first reaction to all things by this...stupid... I see where you're coming from. It smells like that mosquito repellant again (I'm trying to identify what kind of construction chemical this is) yeah, rubber. On her skin: Cement mixer. I'm gonna smell like ginseng, poop, and cement mixer. Now it's mosquito repellant again. Julie, you should wear a lot of this and you'll never get bitten by mosquitoes again.
Hellcat
"A dark and ferociously sexy blend of Black Oud, Black Musk, Labdanum, and spiced Pipe Tobacco blended with a seductive purr of Black Opium."
Me: In bottle: A combination of the mild Cetaphil smell, mosquito repellant, and magazine perfume insert. It's not even bad either! I... I kinda like it. On my skin: Turned sour and now it smells like pickles and Cetaphil. Don't get me wrong, I'm a pickles lovin' girl, but I've never possessed a need to smell like one.
Bf: In bottle: Have you ever thought that people were selling these because they don't like them??!? This smells disgusting. Take this awaayyy...
RM: In bottle: *laughing* I'm going to fucking cry. Mosquito repellant. And.... rotten soap? I dun wanna put it on my skin, bro.
Deadly Nightshade
"A darkly feminine blend of deep purple violets in a hypnotic chypre of sueded dark leathers, aged patchouli, midnight-black amber, and a narcotic swirl of opium."
Me: In bottle: Oddly fruity leather. On my skin: I hate agreeing that things smell like upholstery, but yup, this smells like a new leather sofa. Leather leather leather. Strong leather. Throw is far, and it's so strong that I literally cannot smell anything but it right now. After a while it takes on this sweetness that reminds me of my Retread Lush Conditioner, entwined with the leather. It's already lasted a good long while; wouldn't be surprised if I could still smell it tomorrow morning even after a shower.
Bf: In bottle: Smells like dish.. smells like the green dish soap. What brand is that? It smells like it.
RM: In bottle: It smells like... walking into somebodies house... and they have... leather upholstery. On her skin: Yeah, it smells like this squishy orange fruit that I can't name... and leather upholstery. Squishy orange fruit leather upholstery.
This is really old but Alkemia's oils really need to be aged before they smell their best.
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